Well the past 2 days I've been binging on whatever random shit is in my house and at my friend's.. and I haven't really been able to count however many calories so I've decided I'm starting my diet over. And I'm terrified cause it's my sister's birthday today so I'm gonna be forced to eat cake or something and I really don't want to but like ugh >_< I'm scared. :c I don't even know what we're doing for dinner or anything, but it'll probably be shitloads of calories anyways and I'm not gonna be able to handle that, I don't know why I can't just disappear. I'm too fat to be able to exist. I feel terrible about how much I've eaten. I shouldn't have done that. I'm just so fat it's disgusting and ridiculous. I'm gonna go take another nap now, I've been up since like 9.30 to go to back to school orientation with my friend. And I'm exhausted. And I got my hair dyed&cut yesterday, maybe I'll post a picture later. I dunno, I'm just not in the mood to do anything right now, I just wanna go throw up and cut.
Shannon
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